Internet Explorer as the Psycho Girlfriend
This is adapted from a friend of mine, Brad Taunt. I changed just a little, to make a little bit more defined differences. Enjoy.
Internet Explorer is the scum of the internet. Now before you rant and rave about “hackers” and “trolls” let me explain why almost, well hopefully all, web designers HATE Microsoft’s devil child.
Now for all you non-tech savvy kids out there, let me use the perfect analogy to show just how much IE sucks. Let’s look at all popular web browsers as if they were girlfriends.
Mozilla Firefox, if it were a girlfriend, would be the pretty-yet-geeky, university graduate who everybody knows. She would dress nice no matter the circumstance, be polite and courteous and always try to improve herself, and help out the charitable organizations.
Safari 5.0+ would be gorgeous, very intelligent and also decently popular with the family. She would have one of the best fashion senses, would be very quick witted and could take criticism extremely well. Like that girl from Glee. If you’re into that sort of thing.
Google Chrome would most likely be the best catch of them all. Drop dead gorgeous, polite, constantly learning new things, able to teach other girlfriends how to be as perfect and dress amazing all the time. But the family would be suspicious of her, and not take to her too well.
Now we come down to it…
Internet Explorer. Dear Lord. This one would look like she fell out of the ugly tree and hit every single branch on the way down, then got spit on. She’d be dumb as a post and more stubborn than a cock-eyed donkey when it came to change and dress like a dead homeless person. But WHY is she still around? Because for some unexplainable reason, more than half the internet’s users STILL use her as if she was a free prostitute(which isn’t far from the truth). Why? Why, why, why??
I’ll tell you why; people are lazy and scared to find a different girlfriend. “I’m use to her”, “There’s no way there’s anything better”, “I’m stupid” – all of these common excuses. Well stupid people of the internet, I have news for you: There are other fish in the sea.
p.s. if anyone is reading this in Internet Explorer…I hate you.
Smallville Prop Oops
Here’s a small little tidbit of info for some of you fans of Smallville (or Canadians, or both).
Here I am watching Smallville and lo and behold, an older Blackberry appears on the screen. The logo at the bottom appears familiar to me, so I rewind and look at it very closely.
Somebody please correct me if I’m wrong, but that looks like a Rogers symbol on that Blackberry. I didn’t realize that Rogers was branching out in Kansas.
Spock’s Crib
I’ve been on a Star Trek nostalgia kick today. And guess what I find.
Some people (or networks) have too much time on their hands.